When I was visiting at my sister’s for the Thanksgiving holiday, one of the things I did was to watch the video, Meet the Parents, along with my two nephews, my niece, and one of my nephew’s almost-fiancé. We didn’t watch the video once or twice, but three times. And, each time we laughed all the more at some of the outrageous things that happened to one poor guy.

If you haven’t seen the movie, it’s about a teacher who brings her boyfriend home to meet her parents which is, as you know, the first step in saying, "I’m pretty serious about this guy." Without revealing the details, let it suffice it to say that everything this poor guy does to ingratiate himself to his girlfriend’s father---whose name is Jack---falls nothing short of absolute, complete, and unmitigated disaster. His failures, however, are not so much due to the fact that this poor guy is trying so hard to please Jack but more so because, in Jack’s mind, no boy is good enough for daddy’s little girl. It is after Jack once again proves himself successful in driving out from his daughter’s life yet another potential suitor that Jack is forced to confront the truth. It is wife who quietly, yet sternly, asks, "Isn’t it time, Jack, that you thought about your daughter and her happiness instead of yourself and what you want for her?"

I not going to tell you how Meet the Parents ends because I’ve already suggested what’s important for us today in light of John the Baptist’s call for repentance as the only way to prepare for the coming of God’s kingdom. The important thing Meet the Parents teaches is that, unless we change the way we think about important things, we will---like Jack---delude ourselves into believing that we are good and loving people. Furthermore, we’ll believe with all of our heart that we are doing what’s in the best interests of those we profess to love. But, in reality, what we’re really doing is nothing other than feeding our own selfish self-interests cleverly disguised within the costume of "care." We stand a great distance from the truth because we have freely chosen to live in a delusion. And, sadly, the truth is evident to everybody but ourselves.

Today’s gospel relates John the Baptist’s ministry in the Judean desert and alongside the Jordan River. John is preaching about the need to "repent from sin," specifically rendered in Matthew’s text by the word "metanoia" (in Greek, metanoia). Metanoia is an important word in this gospel, one many Sunday homilists over the decades have unfortunately mistranslated as "change your heart" when, in reality, the word means "change your mind." What John the Baptist was preaching---and what Jack’s wife was communicating through her pointed question---was that, in order to prepare for the coming of God’s kingdom, we must not only change how we feel---which, in itself is no trifling matter---but, more significantly, to change how we think---which is, undoubtedly, an infinitely more exacting matter. And, unless we change how we think, it is impossible to love anyone other than ourselves. Where there is no love, there is no God, as St. John reminds us in his gospel. "God is love. And he who abides in love abides in God and God in him." In short, the antithesis of God’s kingdom is the heart where selfish self-interest reigns. Repenting from sin, then, means "changing how we think." And, by changing how we think provides an indication that we really are serious about preparing for the coming of God’s kingdom.

Well, then, what concretely might that mean?

Consider the following examples to appreciate the point John the Baptist is trying to drive home to his congregation and which, by the way, offended some people so much so that they schemed and eventually succeeded in having the Baptist executed.

• For the first example, take a strident racist or supremacist. For those of you old enough to remember, think about someone like Archie Bunker. It doesn’t matter who this person doesn’t like, because it would be much easier for him to change how he feels about those he considers inferior, wouldn’t it be, than for him to change how he thinks about them? A racist or supremacist could more easily tolerate working beside someone he considers inferior than to change his mind so that he might appreciate those people as human beings equally deserving of his respect.

But, there are less flagrant forms of racism and supremacism to consider. One form manifests itself in the person who treats others with contempt because "it’s either my way or the highway." No one else could possibly have a good idea or suggestion to offer and, were someone so audacious as to broach an alternative, this person would immediately dismiss it thinking to himself---if not uttering aloud---"don’t confuse me with the facts, my mind is already made up." Caught up in his own self-serving world, this person will listen only to himself. Consider how extremely difficult it would be for him to change his mind.

Whether it’s the extreme or less flagrant forms of racism and supremacism, the kingdom of God is very far from such people even though they may believe they are devout and religious people.

• Or, take a person who, for a variety of reasons, has written certain family members out of his life. Perhaps it’s an in-law, an immediate family member, or a former friend. It would be much easier, wouldn’t it, for this fellow to change how he feels about those people, than it would be for him to change how he thinks about them? "Honey, would you do it for me, please. Just this year. Come on, it’s Christmas for God’s sake," his wife might plead. The amount of energy it would take for this individual just to be pleasant might seem like an awful lot of energy. In reality, however, it is only a minimal amount, especially when compared to the amount of energy it would take for him to change how he thinks about the people he has written out of his life. Think about what it would take for him to roll out the welcome mat and to greet those people with genuine warmth, generosity, and true affection.

It’s easy to talk about being a good Christian and a good Catholic. But, when love for sinners is entirely absent from one’s heart, one is neither a good Christian nor a good Catholic. For them, the kingdom of God is very distant.

• As a third example, consider the person who blames the Church for everything. Maybe you’ve never met anyone like this but, in my experience, it’s more commonplace than you’d think. If it wasn’t the pastor who said something or did something sixty years ago to justify why the Church is evil and corrupt, then it’s the marriage tribunal that’s interested "only in money and not in my pain" or the principal or a teacher in the parochial school who’s "destroyed my child’s life." "Would Christ treat anyone this way?" this individual asserts in self-justification. It would be much easier, wouldn’t it, for this individual to change how he feels about Church and the people working for the Church than it would be for that person to change how he thinks about the Church and the people working for it? To move beyond blame-finding and finger-pointing would take a lot of energy, indeed. But, changing how one thinks about what people have said and done, to forgive them, and to move beyond one’s self-chosen spite and hostility is far more taxing.

It needn’t be the Church or any other institution for that matter. It may well be a former boss, neighbor, fiancé, or friend. It doesn’t matter. They did something that hurt us but we’re unwilling to let go of it. As a consequence, we choose to hold grudges and to suffer, sometimes for decades long after we can remember the details of what happened. Think about all of the empty and vacuous holidays these people spend, all the while pretending to be happy. But, having no love in their hearts, the kingdom of God is very far from people who blame others for everything.

The point John the Baptist is making is that, in order to prepare for the coming of God’s kingdom, people need to change how they think about things…especially those things they take for granted as acceptable but, using the standard of God’s kingdom, are completely unacceptable. In particular, John the Baptist challenges people to change how they think about those things that provide justification for not loving or caring or giving a hoot about other human beings. It is much easier for people to change how they feel---they can control outbursts of outrage and even flash a false smile---than to change how they think. But, unless people change how they think, their actions are meaningless, hollow and devoid of any love. Without doubt, the kingdom of God is very far from these sinners, just as it was from the Pharisees and Sadducees who John condemned as a "brood of vipers" for their religious hypocrisy.

"Produce good fruit as evidence of your repentance," John challenged his congregation. St. Paul, in his letter to the Romans was more to the point, writing "Welcome one another, then, as Christ welcomed you." This is how sinners prepare for the coming of God’s kingdom. They make straight their paths so that the Holy Spirit can drive the darkness out of their hears and fill them with the light of love. For these sinners, the kingdom of God is not some far, distant, otherworldly external place, the reward for "being good." Rather, the kingdom of God is the promise of what will be theirs in their hearts, homes, and world.