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It’s a long road between “here” and “there,” between where we
currently find ourselves and where we’d like to find ourselves.
Considering “the peace of God that surpasses all understanding” St.
Paul speaks about and the despair and disillusionment in which we
find ourselves when evil exerts its nefarious power in our lives,
the road seems to be very, very long.
A
couple of months back, I talked with a nine-year-old boy who spends
a lot of time at his friend’s home where they play basketball and
video games together. I asked the young fellow why he spends so
much time at his friend’s home. His matter-of-fact response was, “I
hate home.” Not surprised to hear this—sadly, it’s a prevalent
sentiment among many young people today—but nonetheless sad to hear
him say it, I asked, “Why?” The young fellow said: “My father
drinks too much. Then he starts yelling at me, my Mom, and my
sisters. He swears at my Mom and says bad things about me, too. I
hate my father.”
So,
this young fellow goes over to his friend’s home to leave all of
that pain and hurt behind. There he distracts himself from the
disillusionment and despair he feels deep inside of his soul. What
young fellow would ever want to hate his father?
It
just so happened that I also had a chance to visit with his older
sister a short time later when she came over to see her girlfriend
who just happens to be the older sister of this young fellow’s
friend. A ninth grader, she’s maturing into a beautiful young
woman. But, I have to say based upon that one observation, I’m
fearful of the direction she’s headed in life. Her scantily clothed
body and overblown makeup were more suggestive of a prostitute
walking the streets than a young junior high school student. I fear
it’s not going to be long before she’s looking for love in all of
the wrong places.
“Your brother told me you Dad drinks too much,” I said to the young
woman.
It
took her a while to respond to my statement. She first had to cast
that “older sister’s” nasty glance in the direction of her younger
brother because he had revealed a “state secret.”
“Yah, he drinks way too much,” she said.
“Does your Dad’s behavior change when he drinks?” I asked.
“A
whole lot,” she said, adding, “When he drinks, my Dad’s mean to me,
my Mom, my sister, and my brother, too. He makes my Mom cry. I
hate my father.”
“How do you handle that?” I asked.
“I
go up to my room and cry. Or, I come here to my friend’s house.
Sometimes, I talk to my aunt.”
So,
this young woman goes up to her room, over to her friend’s home, or
talks with her aunt to put all of that pain and hurt behind. Like
her brother, she also is feeling disillusionment and despair deep
inside of her soul. What young woman would ever want to hate her
father?
And, if that’s not sad enough, I also happened to talk to the man’s
wife who came by a little later to pick up her son and daughter.
“Can we talk for a minute?” I asked.
“Sure,” she said.
“I
know your husband is quite likely an alcoholic. I also know he is
destroying your family life and perhaps even your marriage.”
“How did you know?” she asked warily. That’s when the tears started
to stream from her eyes and down her cheeks.
I
don’t know what this woman and mother is doing to deal with the
disillusionment and despair she feels deep inside of her soul. But,
I do know that she feels powerless against the nefarious power of
evil enveloping her, and that she is desperate for God to intervene
so she can experience salvation from sin.
Just like the people in today’s gospel, so too this young fellow,
his sister, and their mother are asking, “What are we to do?”
because they want to get out of the Hell in which they find
themselves and to experience the joy of Christmas.
What this young fellow, his sister, and their mother understand very
well is precisely what the season of Advent is all about.
Individually and collectively, they are hoping and awaiting the Lord
to break into their lives. They are desperate for the Lord to save
them from what the nefarious power of evil is doing to destroy their
lives and family. The tears in their souls are crying out and
demanding, “Maranatha” (that is, “Come, Lord). The tears
aren’t asking God—as if the young man, his sister, and their mother
are inviting God to High Tea—or pleading with God—as if, by begging,
God will listen to them. No, the three are demanding that God come
into their lives and save them.
There’s a tremendous distance, however, between experiencing evil
exerting its nefarious power in our lives and experiencing what St.
Paul in today’s epistle called “the peace of God that surpasses all
understanding.” The journey from Point A to Point B begins as we
recognize the power of evil for what it is—a nefarious power seeking
to destroy what our souls long for—and, once recognizing this, to
realize our powerlessness and allow the tears in our souls to cry
out and demand “Maranatha”—“come Lord”—because the power of
evil has turned our lives and world upside-down and inside-out.
Advent isn’t about wallowing in self-pity, disillusion, or despair.
Nor is advent about pretending that everything will magically be
made okay come Christmas Day simply by clicking the heels of our
shoes together. No, Advent is about demanding the Lord to come into
our lives—ordering the One who created us into the disillusionment
and despair caused by sin—making it impossible to experience what St. Paul called “the
peace of God that surpasses all understanding.”
When we find ourselves experiencing disillusionment and despair,
it’s pretty common to wonder “Why is God doing this to me?” We have
to be careful about adopting that attitude because it can be nothing
more than self-pity, psychologically speaking. What is also pretty
common when we find ourselves in this position is to believe God is
absent from our disillusionment and despair. That attitude is
deadly, spiritually speaking. Why? Because the Prophet Zephaniah
told us in today’s first reading that God has already “removed the
judgment against you, he has turned away your enemies.” Zephaniah
continues:
The
King of Israel, the Lord, is in your midst, you have no further
misfortune to fear…Fear not, O Zion, be not discouraged! The Lord,
you God is in your midst, a mighty savior.
When John the Baptist told the people of their sinfulness and need to change how they think (metanoia,
in Greek), the people asked the
Baptist three different times, “What are we to do?” Yes, we ask, what are the children of
alcoholic fathers and the wives of alcoholic husbands to do? When
we realize that we also sin and need to be saved, we also ask: “What
are we to do?” St. Paul answers the question directly: “…in
everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, make
your requests known to God.”
Advent is not the time we ask God for material gifts, as if God is
“Great Santa Claus in the Sky” who will give us everything we want.
No, Advent is the time we demand that God come into our lives and
give us what we need: salvation from sin…that God be our savior.
That spiritual gift, the experience of salvation, is what Christmas
is truly all about.
Most of us know very well how to make our requests known to God
(especially for those material gifts during the run up to
Christmas). But how often do we preface our requests, as St. Paul
tells us, with “thanksgiving”?
Think of that young fellow and his sister.
They might pray: “Please God, make my Dad sober.” If they pray in
this way, notice that they are focusing upon what they want and not
upon what they need. St. Paul wants them to pray differently:
“Thank you, Lord, for the gift of life, for the gift of my Mom and
Dad. I love them really a whole lot. Please help my Dad to get
well so that he can be for me what I need my Dad to be for me.
Please be for me what only You can be for me, the one who saves me
from this evil.”
Think of their Mom.
She
might be praying: “Please God, make my husband sober.” Again,
notice that she is focusing upon what she wants and not necessarily
what she needs. St. Paul would urge her to pray differently: “Thank
you, Lord, for the gift of my husband who I love very much as I have
from the first day I met him. He’s very sick and in need of your
healing power. Only through Your power can he be what I need my
husband to be for me and our children. Save me from this evil!”
Yes, there is a very long road between “here” and “there,” between
where we currently find ourselves and where we’d like to find
ourselves. How we pray, however, has the spiritual power to change the
dynamics of the journey from here to there.
When we make our requests with thanksgiving, we focus not upon the
disillusionment and despair—the darkness—that the nefarious power of
evil has unleashed in our lives. Instead, St. Paul reminds us, when
we make our requests with thanksgiving, our focus turns away from
ourselves and what we want toward God, the many ways that God has
already blessed us, and our need for the One who has already saved us
from evil.
When we pray in this way, St. Paul writes, “the peace of God that
surpasses all understanding will guard your hearts and minds in
Christ Jesus.”
A very brief commercial
break...
As
Catholics, we prepare for Christ's coming by celebrating the season
of Advent. During the coming four weeks, we prepare the way
for Christ to come into our own lives each and every day not just on
Christmas day. For Catholic families, let me suggest five
practical ways to prepare for Christ's coming:
1. Place
an advent wreath in the center of your dinner table. Each
evening before sitting down for dinner, have one member offer a
prayer of thanksgiving to God for His presence in the life of your
family and light the appropriate candle(s).
2. Use
an Advent calendar.
Hang an
advent calendar on the refrigerator door beginning on December 1st.
Each morning, before everyone scatters for the day, have one member
of the family open one door and read the scripture verse or describe
the biblical scene behind the door. This is a great way for
family members to keep focused on the coming of Christ for the rest
of the day.
3. Make
a Jesse tree. The Jesse tree is the traditional way that
Catholics recall Jesus' heritage, coming from the line of King
David, the son of Jesse. Have members of the family make a
symbol for each day of Advent that marks an important moment in
Israel's history (e.g., Noah's ark, Jacob's ladder, Moses' stone
tablets, David's harp). Then, each evening before everyone
goes to bed, gather the family around the Jesse tree, have the
family member explain the symbol, and hang it on the tree.
4.
Celebrate the Feast of St. Nicholas on December 6th. One
way to "put Christ back into Christmas" is to reclaim the
faith-filled life of heroic virtue revealed in the great Christian
saint, St. Nicholas of Myra. Besides sharing simple gifts with
family members, like placing candy in shoes that have been left
outside of the bedroom door, share some time with people who are
alone, in the hospital, convalescing, etc.
5.
Celebrate God's mercy. Advent is a particularly fitting
time for every member of the family to welcome the light of God's
forgiveness into the dark places of family life. Gather the
family together and go to church to celebrate the Sacrament of
Penance together. Then, go out for pizza to celebrate God's
mercy and a new beginning free from sin.
By
participating in these five practical activities to prepare for Christmas
day, Catholic families will not only have contemplated their need
for God and God's self-revelation through salvation history.
In addition, they will have experienced God present and active in
their family's life. Then, on Christmas day, when family
members greet one another by saying, "Merry Christmas," they all will
truly be prepared to celebrate the Mass wherein Christ will
strengthen and nourish them with his body and blood to bring Christ
to the world.
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HOMILY
