topleft05.jpg (18208 bytes)HOMILY
Solemnity of the Holy Family (C)
27 December 09
 


 

With the rain melting away those twenty or so inches of snow from last weekend’s storm, AccuWeather today is warning of the potential for flooding.  Any of us who have cracks in the foundation of our homes are likely keeping an eye on these weather-related developments should any of the water from the rain and melting snow begin finding its way into our basements.

We all know the drill.  The water finds any small fissure and then begins winding its course through the fissure, turning it into a crack.  As the water continues to seep through the crack, it increases in size as the pressure produced by the amount of water trying to wind its path through the crack increases.  Then, should the temperature drop below freezing, the water expands, creating a breach to the foundation that allows even more water to seep through the foundation and into the basement.  This produces what is a homeowner’s nightmare because once a foundation is breached, it is extremely difficult and expensive to fix.

Every homeowner knows the lesson of this story: deal with those cracks and fissures to the home’s foundation today before the rainwater and/or melting snow causes a breach and a lot of water-related damage to the basement tomorrow.  As the adage notes: Better safe than sorry!

Like the snow and rain today has the potential to increase pressure upon the foundation of our homes, this past year has increased the amount of pressure upon many marriages and families in our parish.  We oftentimes don’t think about it, but those pressures tend to be like the water winding its way into our basements.  Most obviously, financial pressures have challenged almost all of us.  There also are all of those work-related and health-related pressures. For some of us, our relatives and neighbors have increased the pressures upon our marriages and families.  For many of our young people, there are the real pressures associated with school and just plain old growing up.

Pope John Paul II described these pressures that have the potential to destroy the foundations of marriages and families using the term the “culture of death.”  For John Paul II, when these pressures find a fissure in the foundation of a marriage or family, they soon become cracks that, when left unaddressed, have the potential to breach the foundation of any marriage or family.  What God intended to be the primary place where human beings experience the “culture of life” quickly becomes the fertile breeding ground of the “culture of death.”

Think about it.  No couple gets married with the idea of getting divorced.  No child grows up wishing his or her parents get divorced or happy that they do.  No parent hopes a child will become addicted to drugs, alcohol, pornography, or whatever the peer group may be requiring of its members.  Yet, the harsh and truthful reality is that all of this will happen—our marriages and homes will become the fertile breeding grounds of the culture of death—if husbands and wives do not attend to those fissures and cracks when they first appear in the foundation of their marriages and family life.

Not painting a pretty picture, am I?  Well, it’s quite likely that all of us know personally of marriages and families that have been washed away by the pressures that turned fissures into cracks and the cracks into a breach of the foundation of at least one, if not many marriages and families.  In every case I know of, those pressures had been building for more than just the past year.  But, this past year’s pressures—difficult as they many have been to withstand—were not the primary cause of the breach.  No, this past year’s pressures merely exacerbated what had already been cracked and went unfixed.  They were the “straw that broke the camel’s back.”  Now the foundation of those marriages and families have been breached and it’s extremely difficult as well as spiritually, emotionally, and legally expensive to fix, that is, if they can be fixed at all.  And, sadly for all involved, most can’t be fixed.  The marriage and family are a total loss.

You many believe there’s nothing sadder than to see than enraged spouses spewing venomous charges against one another as their children listen or watch on, powerless to do anything about it but hoping against hope that their parents would just love one other.  But, there is something sadder and I’ve seen all too much of it this past year.  It’s to see those children not experiencing the life-giving, life-sustaining, and life-nurturing benefit of parents who love one another and then being split in their allegiance to their parents or, even worse yet, having to choose one over the other.

Let me ask you what is arguably two very important questions.  First: Where are our young people to learn that marriage is a sacrament of commitment to mutual love and fidelity, if not from their parents?  Second: Where are our young people to learn about family life and what it requires to have a very strong and vibrant family life, if not from their parents?

If you think your marriage and family is worth fighting for and you want to fix those fissures before the pressures turn them into cracks or the cracks into breaches, theres a book I would suggest that you read.  The book was written by Rebecca Hagelin.  She entitled it “30 Ways in 30 Days to Save Your Family.”  (Mrs. Hagelin also has a free newsletter available from: http://www.HowToSaveYourFamily.com.)


 

Mrs. Hagelin wrote the book because she wanted parents around the nation to know that there are concrete things they can do to strengthen their bonds with their children, to assist their children grow in their faith, and to equip their children to tower above pop culture.  The culture of death Pope John Paul II talked about neither a “Left” or “Right” nor a “Liberal” or “Conservative” issue.  It’s an issue for all spouses and all parents, because unless they are willing to do something and to fight for their marriages and families, our national culture will continue to weaken.  Don’t forget the aphorism: “As the family goes, so goes the nation.”

Consider this one sad fact: In 1950, for every 100 babies born, 23 were born to a broken family (that is, either out of wedlock or to a family that would soon suffer divorce).  Today, for every 100 babies born, 60 are born to a broken family.  That trajectory tells us something about the spiritual health and integrity of not only of our marriages and our families but also of our nation.  If those fissures and cracks in the foundations of these institutions are not yet being breached, the statistics indicate they soon will be breached.

“How so?” you might be wondering.

When parents fail to teach their children personal responsibility, commitment, fidelity, and sound financial planning, timeless values today are coming under assault by a 24/7 media corporate world whose leaders endeavor to drive up ratings (and hence, income) by shocking audiences which, in turn, deadens the “shock value” until there is nothing shocking left and everything seems okay, just a matter of preference rather than truth.

We all know that the 24/7 media corporate world ridicules faith and prayer and how some members of the clergy contributed mightily to the media’s ability to depict the Church as filled with and governed by a bunch of sexually corrupt predators so that this institution created by God grows increasingly impotent in meeting the moral challenges facing spouses and parents today.  The 24/7 media corporate world is assailing the institution of marriage because they want to legislate a change to what they call the “traditional definition” in order to undermine what God has instituted and no human being may put asunder.  And, that’s to say nothing about how the 24/7 media corporate world depicts all of those titans who commit crimes and whose companies are bailed out and rescued, even when the sum involves hundreds of millions if not billions of dollars.  Who cares about the virtue of justice and making restitution for one’s violation of God’s law, “Thou shalt not steal”?  What about those all of those middle schoolers—that’s eleven, twelve, and thirteen year olds—who are “sexting” and their older siblings who have built up huge credit debts before graduating from college?

Is nothing sacred any more?  Is everything profane to be celebrated?  Is financial irresponsibility the way to a happy future?

As Mrs. Hagelin reminds her readers, the bogeyman in today’s culture is not all of those people.  Although we should not dismiss what they are doing, the bogeyman in today’s culture is all those adults who are attempting to destroy what spiritually mature and virtuous spouses and parents value.  Don’t ever forget: it’s adults who create the sexually promiscuous teen pop-icons that children admire; it’s adults who are spamming the inboxes of children with provocative emails; and, it’s adults who are designing the racy window displays and the thongs that ten-year-olds just can’t live without.

While many spouses and parents may feel hopeless, there is hope for your marriages, your families, and our nation as well.  You can make a difference in your own home.  But, you will have to fight all of those pressures that adults are exerting to create fissures and cracks in the foundations of your marriages and families.  Remember: these are the people who are using your children as their pawns to gin up their income.  To make a difference in your homes, Mrs. Hagelin argues that parents must do two things:

·       First: re-commit yourselves each day to mutual love and fidelity and to deal with those fissures that threaten your marriages and families.   Good marriages are not without their share of difficulties and problems; but, marriages that fail result inevitably from spouses who do not deal with the fissures when they appear so that they turn into cracks.  When this happens it’s not a matter of if but of now and how: spouses need to take immediate action so that the foundation of their marriages and families will not be breached.  If spouses don’t love each other enough to make this daily re-commitment to each other, then they should do so because they love their children more than they love themselves.  Neglect is no option when the stakes are so high.

·       Second: commit yourselves to deliberate parenting.  In daily practice, deliberate parenting means that both parents will let their children know they love them enough that they will monitor the media their children consume as well as find other parents and families who share similar values and are committed to deliberate parenting.  It is only as parents and families work together that they can keep the foundations of their marriages and families from being breached by the media’s 24/7 assault. I’d only add that deliberate parenting begins with parents waking up each morning bound and determined to pass on their values to their children.  This should be every couple’s second prayer upon awakening every morning!  (The first prayer is to give thanks to God for the gift of life and one’s spouse.)
 

In today’s epistle, St. Paul also offered a way for spouses and parents today to confront this culture of death and to build strong marriages and families:

Because you are God’s chosen ones, holy and beloved, clothe yourselves with heartfelt mercy, with kindness, humility, meekness and patience. Bear with one another, forgive whatever grievances you have against one another. Forgive as the Lord has forgiven you. Over all these virtues put on love, which binds the rest together and makes them perfect. Christ’s peace must reign in your hearts, since as members of the one body you have been called to that peace....
 

Yes, marriage and family life is being distorted, twisted, tortured today by adults who are using the power of 24/7 media to make spouses and parents feel powerless, as the culture of death pressures the foundations of their marriages and families as well as our nation’s moral standards.

This culture of death requires of spouses and parents something that Mrs. Hagelin didn’t mention in her book, but is evident in the marriage of Joseph and Mary: have an enormous amount of trust in God and keep God in the center of their marriage and family life.  In today’s gospel, we heard a bout how attentive Mary and Joseph were to Jesus’ every step.  But no parent is perfect and a child can slip away, lured by the pressures exerted by the culture of death.  Realizing that their son had slipped away, Joseph and Mary raced back to Jerusalem in search of Jesus.  Imagine their fear and tears giving way to delight as Joseph and Mary find their son safe, and their joy as Jesus returned with them to Nazareth, was obedient to them, advanced in wisdom and age and favor before God and everyone who knew him.

The Marine Corps recruitment slogan a few years back was “The toughest job you will ever love.”  Loving your spouse and your children enough to confront the culture of death is the toughest job spouses or parents will ever love.  Doing what love requires—this is all that God asks of spouses and parents—is oftentimes the painful thing.  But, to watch your children grow in age and grace and wisdom before God and all of those adults who are pressuring your children to allow the culture of death to breach their moral foundations, well, I ask on this Solemnity of the Holy Family: What could bring spouses and parents greater joy?

 

 

A brief commercial break...
 

As Catholics, one way to celebrate the Christmas season can also serve as a great catechetical tool.  The popular song "The Twelve Days of Christmas" is usually viewed as simply a nonsense song for children with secular origins.  However, some have suggested that it is a song of catechesis , perhaps dating to the 16th century religious wars in England, with hidden references to the basic teachings of the Catholic faith.  As such, the song provided a mnemonic device to teach the catechism to young people. The "true love" mentioned in the song is not an earthly suitor, but refers to God Himself.  The "me" who receives the presents refers to every baptized person who is part of the Catholic faith.  Each of the "days" represents some aspect of the Catholic faith that was important for young people to learn...not only during the Reformation era but today, too!

So, here's how to do this:

Assign each of the 12 days to family members.  Then, each evening as the family gathers for dinner, sing the appropriate verse(s) for the day.  After singing the verse, have the family member assigned to that day describe the symbol and its religious significance.  Praying the devotional for each day reinforces the symbol and its meaning.  As the 12 days continue and the number of catechetical lessons increase, have different family members recall the meaning of each symbol.

(I have borrowed what follows from Dennis Bratcher's website, "The Twelve Days of Christmas.)

(Click on each picture below to go to a devotional for that day)

On the 1st day of Christmas my true love gave to me...

Day 1, Christmas Day, December 25

A Partridge in a Pear Tree

The partridge in a pear tree is Jesus the Christ, the Son of God, whose birthday we celebrate on December 25, the first day of Christmas. In the song, Christ is symbolically presented as a mother partridge that feigns injury to decoy predators from her helpless nestlings, recalling the expression of Christ's sadness over the fate of Jerusalem: "Jerusalem! Jerusalem! How often would I have sheltered you under my wings, as a hen does her chicks, but you would not have it so . . . ." (Luke 13:34)

 

On the 2nd day of Christmas my true love gave to me...

Day 2, December 26

Two Turtle Doves

The Old and New Testaments, which together bear witness to God's self-revelation in history and the creation of a people to tell the Story of God to the world.

 

On the 3rd day of Christmas my true love gave to me...

Day 3, December 27

Three French Hens

The Three Theological Virtues:  1) Faith, 2) Hope, and 3) Love (1 Corinthians 13:13)

 

On the 4th day of Christmas my true love gave to me...

Day 4, December 28

Four Calling Birds

The Four Gospels: 1) Matthew, 2) Mark, 3) Luke, and 4) John, which proclaim the Good News of God's reconciliation of the world to Himself in Jesus Christ.

 

On the 5th day of Christmas my true love gave to me...

Day 5, December 29

Five Gold Rings

The first Five Books of the Old Testament, known as the Torah or the Pentateuch:  1) Genesis, 2) Exodus, 3) Leviticus, 4) Numbers, and 5) Deuteronomy, which gives the history of humanity's sinful failure and God's response of grace in the creation of a people to be a light to the world.

 

On the 6th day of Christmas my true love gave to me...

Day 6, December 30

Six Geese A-Laying

The six days of creation that confesses God as Creator and Sustainer of the world (Genesis 1).

 

On the 7th day of Christmas my true love gave to me...

Day 7, December 31

Seven Swans A-Swimming

The seven gifts of the Holy Spirit: 1) prophecy, 2) ministry, 3) teaching, 4) exhortation, 5) giving, 6) leading, and 7) compassion (Romans 12:6-8; cf. 1 Corinthians 12:8-11)

 

On the 8th day of Christmas my true love gave to me...

Day 8, January 1

Eight Maids A-Milking

The eight Beatitudes: 1) Blessed are the poor in spirit, 2) those who mourn, 3) the meek, 4) those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, 5) the merciful, 6) the pure in heart, 7) the peacemakers, 8) those who are persecuted for righteousness' sake. (Matthew 5:3-10)

 

On the 9th day of Christmas my true love gave to me...

Day 9, January 2

Nine Ladies Dancing

The nine Fruit of the Holy Spirit: 1) love, 2) joy, 3) peace, 4) patience, 5) kindness, 6) generosity, 7) faithfulness, 8) gentleness, and 9) self-control.  (Galatians 5:22)

 

On the 10th day of Christmas my true love gave to me...

Day 10, January 3

Ten Lords A-Leaping

The ten commandments: 1) You shall have no other gods before me; 2) Do not make an idol; 3) Do not take God's name in vain; 4) Remember the Sabbath Day; 5) Honor your father and mother; 6) Do not murder; 7) Do not commit adultery; 8) Do not steal; 9) Do not bear false witness; 10) Do not covet. (Exodus 20:1-17)

 

On the 11th day of Christmas my true love gave to me...

Day 11, January 4

Eleven Pipers Piping

The eleven Faithful Apostles: 1) Simon Peter, 2) Andrew, 3) James, 4) John, 5) Philip, 6) Bartholomew, 7) Matthew, 8) Thomas, 9) James bar Alphaeus, 10) Simon the Zealot, 11) Judas bar James.  (Luke 6:14-16).  The list does not include the twelfth disciple, Judas Iscariot who betrayed Jesus to the religious leaders and the Romans.

 

On the 12th day of Christmas my true love gave to me...

Day 12, January 5

Twelve Drummers Drumming

The twelve points of doctrine in the Apostles' Creed: 1) I believe in God, the Father almighty, creator of heaven and earth. 2) I believe in Jesus Christ, his only Son, our Lord. 3) He was conceived by the power of the Holy Spirit and born of the virgin Mary. 4) He suffered under Pontius Pilate, was crucified, died, and was buried. He descended into hell [the grave]. 5) On the third day he rose again. He ascended into heaven, and is seated at the right hand of the Father. 6) He will come again to judge the living and the dead. 7) I believe in the Holy Spirit, 8) the holy catholic Church, 9) the communion of saints, 10) the forgiveness of sins, 11) the resurrection of the body, 12) and life everlasting.

 

Epiphany, January 6

An Epiphany Devotional, January 6

An Epiphany Devotional

 

Participating in this catechetical activity during the Twelve Days of Christmas, the entire family can learn about and recall the basic elements of the Catholic faith.

 

 

 

mail2.gif (2917 bytes)      Does today’s homily raise any question(s) that you would like
                   me to respond to? Mail your question(s) by double clicking on
               
    the mailbox. I will respond to your question(s) at my first
                   available opportunity.


   Double click on this button to return to the homily
                                         webpage.