topleft05.jpg (18208 bytes)HOMILY
Thirty-First Sunday in Ordinary Time (A)
30 October 11
 


 

From the place I take on this side of the altar rail, I get a glimpse of the faces of parishioners that most who are seated in the pews never get a chance to see.

Consider the boredom written across the faces of so many young parishioners.  Their clenched teeth and dead, straight-forward, and blank stare suggests they’re mighty angry as they struggle with answering the question, “Why do I have to be here?”  The scowl on the faces of some other young parishioners seems to place the burden on me.  They’re asking, “Why are you putting me through this?  Don’t you get how boring you and all of this is?”  Then, there’s the busy index fingers of those few young people I’ve observed texting, not only during the homily (that may be understandable), but also during the Offertory and Holy Communion as well (that’s not understandable at all).  They try very hard to disguise the fact that they are texting, but let me assure them, it’s quite obvious they’re texting and attempting not to be caught in the act...which, of course, they know means it is inappropriate to be doing so during Mass..

All of that can be somewhat distracting, if not disheartening.  It’s not as if I enjoy causing the young people in the parish to experience so much angst.  But, I do understand their plight.  As a teenager, I recall my maternal grandmother reaming me out after the 9:00 Mass one Sunday morning for my complete disinterest in the Mass and for fooling around with my brother.  But, I was thinking at the time, what’s better than to fidget, fuss, push, kick, stick fingers into your brother’s ribs, and whisper funny comments into his ear during Mass?  I’m supposed to pay attention and pray?

What you have to understand is that my grandmother observed all of this because she was seated behind my Mom and my sister, brother, and me.  But, insofar as I was concerned, there was one, pesky problem with all of her concern for my impropriety and the salvation of my soul: She had arrived late for Mass…yet again this week!

As she was reaming me out, I was thinking:

So, if Sunday Mass is so important and such a priority for you, then why do you come late for the beginning of Mass so often?  Who’s being the hypocrite here?  I never said Sunday Mass is a priority for me; yet, you say it is for you!  Why, then, are you never late when Tuesday rolls around and you and Mom are going out to lunch?
 

But, I knew better than to lecture my grandmother about her hypocrisy.  I’d have absolutely zero chance of winning that smack-down.

Today, however, those aren’t the faces of parishioners I want to focus upon.  Consider these three faces:

1.    Why is a child’s reception of the sacraments of baptism and first Holy Communion such a big event for parents?  When a son or daughter is baptized or receives the Body and Blood of Christ for the very first time, why is it that the child’s parents get lost in their thoughts and their faces look so serene as they gaze lovingly upon their child?

2.    Why do parents—especially Moms—always beam with pride when their child parades up the aisle the first time he or she is serving Mass?  Sometimes, a parent even takes pictures!  What’s that all about?

3.    Why do parents—even Dads, although many of them try very hard to hide it—always cry at a child’s wedding?
 

The answer to these questions, it seems to me, is pretty straight-forward.  In today’s epistle, St. Paul used these words to give his answer:

With such affection for you, we were determined to share with you not only the gospel of God (that’s what many Catholic parents attempt to do…to share with their children the gospel of God), but our very selves as well, so dearly beloved had you become to us.  You recall…our toil and drudgery (at least, that’s what many Catholic parents hope).  Working day and night in order not to burden any of you, we proclaimed to you the gospel of God.

 

What is it that causes that serenity, that beaming with pride, and all of those tears?  It’s the experience of getting a glimpse of the Promised Land!  It’s a response to seeing that what those parents believe is most important in life is beginning to take hold in their child.  The baptism and first Holy Communion is the beginning; serving at the altar is a step forward; and, getting married in the Church is an implicit, “Well done, good and faithful servant….enter into the joy of your master.”

As St. Paul continued his discussion:

And for this reason we too give thanks to God unceasingly, that, in receiving the word of God from hearing us, you receive not a human word but, as it truly is, the word of God, which is now at work in you who believe.
 

One of the greatest joys of Catholic parenting is just that: to behold God’s word alive and at work in their children who believe.  I might add, conversely, that one of the greatest pains of Catholic parenting is to watch children turn away from the faith and its practice.

In raising their children as Catholics today, the temptation many Catholic parents have to confront and overcome in their role as the primary and best educator of their children in faith and morals is to reduce the Catholic faith to the Church’s laws and regulations.  All of those are a human response to the fact that so many Catholics over the centuries have tried to identify “minimal expectations”—the minimum one must do—to call oneself Catholic with a clear conscience.  And, in particular, when teenagers resist the valuable catechism lessons their parents are teaching, while demanding the absolute minimum may make great sense, it just so happens that following the letter of the law isn’t what Jesus taught to be important.  No, in today’s gospel, Jesus said living the spirit of the law in such a way that one also fulfills the letter of the law is essential.

Following the letter is hollow, conformity for conformity’s sake.  And sometimes, yes, the absolute, bare minimum is all that Catholic parents can hope for, especially when they have to deal with belligerent teenagers.  One day their children may appreciate these efforts.  Perhaps not ever.

We have all heard those who have opined that it’s tougher to raise children in the faith today than it has ever been in human history.  Those who make this assertion frequently cite technology as the culprit.  Some others cite our culture’s crass materialism.  Others point the finger of blame at our largely secular and consumerist mentality.  All of these explanations make sense, and it seems, are plausible in identifying why so many young Catholic people today resist their parents’ best efforts to teach them the Church’s faith and its practice.

I would like to suggest another explanation: Many Catholic parents only fulfill the absolute, bare minimums themselves.  Parents may say “You should pray daily,” “It sure would be good if you read some religious literature,” “Go to Mass,” and “You should go to confession.”  But, are those parents teaching their children to imitate them, as Jesus said instructed his disciples to do—“Be imitators of me”—or are they requiring of their children what they are not doing themselves?  Their children, knowing the difference between the letter and the spirit of the law, as Jesus taught it in today’s gospel, see straight through the hypocrisy.

Where this is an accurate portrayal of the “religion battles” that are taking place in many families in our parish, let me submit that what this attitude and behavior reflects, in general but not necessarily in specific, is the form of religious education their parents are providing their children.

Remember the aphorism, “The family that prays together, stays together”?

Statistics concerning divorce suggest that the aphorism is as true today as it was whenever that “certain someone” dreamed it up.  The simple truth is that the family that doesn’t pray together—with Mom and Dad making family prayer a priority by leading the family in prayer—is far more likely to visited by the tragedy of divorce as well as other social pathologies than when families practice daily prayer.

Talk about heart break!  No experience of the Promised Land here!

All of this came to mind as I read a wonderful book written by Senator Joseph Lieberman of Connecticut, The Gift of Rest.  An observant Jew, Senator Lieberman discusses God’s gift of the Sabbath and its importance in life as well as how our culture has overlooked or even shunned this blessing.  It’s not simply that the last day of the week has lost much of its religious meaning in our culture, although that’s important.  No, it’s how parents have lost what once provided an important touchstone for building a strong family life, one rooted in faith and its practice.

One of the “simple tips” Senator Lieberman offers his readers to re-kindle the spirit of the Sabbath speaks directly to the point of family prayer when raising children in the faith.  One of the religious traditions that Senator Lieberman and his wife, Hadassah, decided to practice each Sabbath with their children came at the end of the Sabbath dinner meal.  Before everyone would run off in various directions to do things like homework, household chores, play with their friends, and the like, Senator Lieberman and his wife would stand up at their seats.  Then, raising their hands in blessing to form the Hebrew letter “Shin” (for “Shaddai”), they would pray over their children:

May the Lord bless you and protect you.

(Their children would respond) Yes, may it be His will.

May the face of the Lord shine upon you and be gracious to you.

(Their children would respond) Yes, may it be His will.

May the Lord lift up His face you and give you peace.

(Their children would respond) Yes, may it be His will.

 

Senator Lieberman and his wife would then place their hands in the “Shin” form upon each child’s head who, in turn, would respond, “Amen.”

Isn’t that a beautiful ritual prayer, one that can be easily implemented into daily family life and one that has the power to communicate the roots of faith and its practice in family life?

Not only that.

Consider the child, who from one’s earliest years through young adulthood, was reminded by his or her parents every week not only that they were a source of God’s blessing for this child’s life but also that this child was a source of God’s blessing in their lives.  Would it be more or less likely, on average, that this child would resent faith and its practice?  Would it be more or less likely, on average, that this child would dabble in socially pathological behavior?

I doubt either would be the case.

Perhaps—although not necessarily in every instance—the lack of interest in the Catholic faith and its practice in young people today can be traced directly back to parental lack of practice of the faith in the home.  Little wonder that secularism, materialism, and consumerism step in to fill this spiritual void in the in the lives of so many young peoplet today.

That is certainly something to be considered and discussed today, especially as we celebrate Halloween.  How did I work that one in?  The question is: Are many parents masquerading as Catholics?  And the challenge is: If they are, do Catholic parents want to recover the experience of the Promised Land as they behold their children—that feeling of serenity, that beaming with pride, and all of those tears—as St. Paul noted, and they observe “the word of God, which is now at work in you who truly believe”?

Knowing that Jesus railed against hypocrisy, let all of us pray assiduously that the parents in our parish who are raising children will once again work night and day, not to burden their children with the letter of the law, but to proclaim the spirit of the law through the example of their lives.  Sunday Mass is only “meaningful” to the degree that each of us has a relationship with God that impacts our everyday lives.  And that hinges, of course, on how we live out that relationship each day of our lives.

 

 

 

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